Dear Jess,

  My parents are split and our family is completely screwed up. My parents claim they are Christian but how could they be when all they do is ruin our family? I can't forgive my father for cheating on my mom, and I can't stand my mother sometimes. No one in our family is happy. Why would God let this happen? Believing in Him sure didn't help our family. I am starting to think He's just an idea people made up to help them get by in life.

     Tearfully, Broken Family

Dear Mending Family,

 You are not alone. During hard times, misunderstandings between family members bother us more than the situation itself. When we face trouble in our relationship with others, we must go to God instead of having ill feelings towards that person (and or people). I know it's painful to go through tough times without knowing His will. We suffer; it is part of the human flesh in us all. But, through suffering we receive more blessings and will be comforted to see how God transforms our sufferings into His divine blessings. Believe me about the blessings. There's that saying  "stick it to the man."  But here "the man"  is God (haha.. Ok corny joke). We are all sinners seduced by the weakness of our flesh. Your parents are no different than any other Christian, struggling with the desires of their flesh just like you. No one is perfect and you cannot expect your parents to be. Just because they are older, doesn't mean that they have all the answers. And yes, by "not perfect"  I mean even alcoholics and axe murderers. Ok well, if your parents are axe murderers they're most likely not Christian and you should get everyone to pray for them, but you know what I mean. Still, look to Jesus Christ as your ultimate Mentor because he is perfect, the Holy Spirit as your Counselor. Think about it, role models on earth, such as pastors, always have added pressure to be perfect. If they fail they endure harsher judgment because they are magnified in people's eyes. As humans we make mistakes, some more than others.
 In Romans 8:28, it says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose"(NIV). God has perfect plans for his children (including your parents, who also are God's children). If you always walk with Him, He will make sure even the bad things in life will work for your good. Not for your fun, or your constant happiness, or your will, but for your good. Stick to God and you will one day see all this. Don't give up on Him, He is faithful even when you're not. Because He sacrificed His son, we should act joyfully as living sacrifices for his service. He wants us to be transformed with renewed minds, meaning living to honor and obey him. Don't think or worry about anyone else, just focus on renewing your mind and let Him renew your spirit. In Psalms 37 David calls for us to delight in the Lord and commit ourselves to Him, entrusting our problems about families (siblings and parents), jobs, anything and everything. Leave it to His control and guidance. To commit to the Lord means to absolutely and joyfully trust Him, believing that He can take care of us better than we can for ourselves. Be waiting patiently while He works out what is best for us. Anger and worry are two destructive emotions that reveal a lack of faith that God loves us and is in control. Focus on God and His goodness and  you will find your peace in your broken home, honey.
          Joyfully, Je¡× ~5
 
"Just Ask Jess"is an advice column where the youth can ask questions or help about their problems. It is also a spiritual hotline for urgent or important prayer requests. You can reach Jess by sending an email to JestJessica@hotmail.com or JestJessica@yahoo.com. She has very powerful prayer; don't miss out! :)